Oh, What A Spectacle!

38DD

That is my bra size. Although I am sure the right one is more a C/D because my kids have preferred to nurse on the left. I have grown to love them the way they are. They have nourished my babies and have been a source of pleasure for my husband.

For sometime I have had some pain in my right breast and right armpit. At times it feels like someone is sticking a needle through my nipple down into my chest cavity. Which is always a wonderful feeling. I am considering medical marijuana seriously. Motrin is crap and bad for my kidney's.

I was going to not do my bloodwork or get my ultrasound. But, Jimmy was getting upset and it literally made him sick. He is now on blood pressure and anxiety meds (also, other things such as kids with medical problems). So with him being sick and my best friend Jeremy explaining how Jimmy was probably feeling, I decided to go ahead with it.

My appointment was scheduled on October 18th, called today and   be going on Sunday. Now the nerves and the paranoia set in. The doctor had said in her opinion that the lumps seem to deep and hard to be cysts....so what pops in my head....cancer. GAH! The other day I was having a facebook conversation with Jimmy's ex-wife and she mentioned maybe calcified milk in a duct. I would prefer the latter. It would ideally like it to be nothing at all.

Now back to your regulalrly scheduled program.....

 

song of the day.

 

 

Interesting fact about me:  I like collecting Pyrex!

Breaking Free and Being At Peace

  My newest tattoo is now finished. It symbolizes more than I can convey about my life. For 34 years I have been afraid of who I am deep inside. Although, I am not ready to shout certain things from roof tops or pay a million dollars for a Super Bowl  ad to say it all, I am no longer afraid. I have peace (dove with olive branch) and I am shattering the windows I have been looking through (stained glass peices).  I am free to be who I am and am soaring (the clouds).

In my life I have few people who know a lot if intimate details of my life. My husband is my best supporter and encourager. If it was not for him I would just be so lost. In some aspects I was a lost soul searching for someone just as lost when I found him. Although, we were lost in different areas of our lives at the time, I think God brought us together. It may not have been the best situation when we first met. He was married and had a child. We were long time friends before we ever really committed (me moving to North Carolina with him.).

My husband encourages me not to be afraid of who I am. He tells me that I am a perfect me.  What else could a girl want from a man? He cares for me, worries for me and at times gets mad at me. We have had our hard time and we have had great times. He encourages me with peace and understanding. I have to say he is the one true blessing in my life.
One tidbit about me:  When Jimmy and I first became friends and lovers I tried pushing him away. I was afraid that nobody could really love me.

 

Peace and Love,

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New Blog: 34 THINGS FOR 34 YEARS

Inspired by my online friend Vanessa at Iced Latte's and Ukelele's, I decided to start a new blog for a new chapter in my life. I really hope 34 isn't too old to accept who I have always been and who I have become. Even though for most of my life I have lived outside to box, there are certain things I have kept to myself, my husband and select close friends. So here I am, I am going to be as honest as I can be about things. This may be of no value to anyone person, but at least I know I am being real.

So to start off, here is a list of things that may or no be true.  You can guess if you want. I may or may not reveal if something is true or  false. Just getting my feet wet.

1. I sometimes pee myself when I laugh.

2. I can be self-loathing.

3. I am a momma of six.

4. I like shopping at high end stores and nothing else will do.

5. I go to Starbucks everyday.

6. My favorite LP/CD/Cassette is Depeche Mode: Some Great Reward.

7. I have Beiber Fever

8. I have to best friends, both male: Jimmy(my husband) and Jeremy (my friend from high school).

9. I like mayonnaise of everything.

10. I am named after my maternal grandmother who passed away long before I was born.

11. I want a job in the local smoke shop.

12. I am over churches, their gossip, and their judgmentation.

13. I have several tattoos and more in the works.

14. I support Prop, 19.

15.I loke to garden food.

16. I have super short pinky fingers.

17. I text more than I should.

18. I want your sex!!!

19. I like dancing in the dark.

20. I want to hula hoop with my own homemade hoop.

21. I am a bibliophile.

22. I don't wear makeup but, secretly consider it.

23. I love my breasts.

24. I am in a battle to lose over 100lbs.

25. I write fiction based on fact.

26. I went over 7 years without owning or wearing pants.

27. I have an infatuation with polygamy.

28.  I like shoes but prefer bare-feet.

29. My bed is a futon.

31. I have been breastfeeding for 8 years, 1 month and 20 days

32. I weigh 235 lbs.

33. I love you!

34. I love life!  

 

Peace and Blessings,

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