Maggie came into this world on June 2, 2004. She came into the world so fast, I did not even realize she was out of my womb. I mean I knew she was but, just could not fathom it. She was like a rocket on her exit. To this day I do not think she was quite ready to make her appearance. We were all ready for her though.
She was always a fun, talkative playful baby and toddler. She loved the water and drawing on walls. I miss that girl so much. The past year...my Maggie has been lost. She is lost to this other person inside her mind.
She has had periods of depression where she would just lay on the couch and suffer from low grade fevers. She would not eat much. It was pretty scary and she ended up in therapy. Honestly, I am not sure that helped her much. She has times where she screams, yells and throws things. It is like she is trying to claw out of the mind and body she is in. She finds her peace in drawing and watching cartoons. She likes Sonic the Hedgehog, AstroBoy and stuff like that. She loves Anime movies.
When her body is tired, her mind does not shut off. She is six and thinks about things like who will she marry? What happens if her husband does not like horses? If I die who will her mom be? Her mind is like this everyday. So when she is physically tired and not mentally it is ugly. Her body and mind battle. She will scream and cry, lay on the ground flopping around. You can see the pain in her eyes, she does not like where she is. She does not like not having control over her mind and her body.
I can only hope and pray one day her body and mind will be in sync...and she will have peace. The peace she was meant to have.
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